Time to Reflect

It seems like those moments that just make the world stop spinning always come out of nowhere. The other day I had to drive about two hours to a ten minute appointment. I started a new job and needed to get my fingerprints taken, but of course, the closest appointment available for the next two weeks was two hours away. Since I didn’t want to wait two weeks to start the job – and I certainly couldn’t wait four weeks for a paycheck, thank you student loans – I decided to take the long drive. Mini road trips can be fun!

So I packed myself a snack and downloaded Felicia Day’s You’re Never Weird On The Internet (Almost) audio book on my phone and away we went.

It’s interesting to drive away from a city in Texas. The trip starts out slow because of traffic, picks up once you hit the outskirts of the suburbs, and then slows down again once you’re in Tractor-ville. Yep. I actually got stuck behind four tractors on the highway. That’s a real thing, not just a line in a country song.

I was tired and a bit bored once I got to the teeny tiny town which housed the drug and alcohol testing office where I was going to get my fingerprints scanned.  If it wasn’t for Felicia and her amazing awkwardness and anxiety I find so familiar, the ride down would’ve been borderline torture.

Seriously. Thank God for Miss Day.

I wasn’t quite ready to duplicate that drive, so instead of heading back to Houston, I got on my phone, found the closest Gulf town worthy of being mentioned on a map, and drove East instead of North. It’s not something I would normally do. I had a mile long To-Do list at home and was seriously thinking about adding in a nice afternoon nap on my last day before that pesky employment was set to kick in. But something just told me to drive. To keep going until I hit a big puddle of salt water and waves. And, for once, I listened to the fun voice in my head rather than that boring everyday nothing new voice.

I’m so glad I did. It was only a couple of hours, but I sat on the beach, listened to an awesome girl read her amazing book to me (via Audible but that takes away from the personal connection we so obviously have), and reflected on so much of life. It was all overwhelming and comforting at the same time. I learned to love myself a little bit more by listening to the fun voice that day. I learned more about myself. I learned off script can be healthy. I learned more than I can put down on paper. But I felt myself grow a little bit that afternoon. Not so much grow up. I think I may have done all of the growing up I’m going to do. But I certainly grew. Instead of up, maybe it was deeper. A better understanding of my roots and more of an appreciation for the fact that those roots still allow me to fly.

It’s getting way too sappy and deep, even for the girl who experienced it all. Ugh! Time to stop.

 

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